Dealing with Loss and Transition: Insights from Current Events

Delivered on Shabbat Chukat at Darchei Noam Community in Pardes Hanna, Israel

Standing before the congregation on Shabbat Chukat, I felt the weight of our current reality pressing heavily upon us. I was asked to speak about Parashat Chukat and wanted to explore a theme that resonates deeply with both our ancient texts and our present circumstances: dealing with loss and transition. Parashat Chukat, from Sefer BaMidbar, The Book of Numbers, offers significant moments of loss and change that mirror the current situation in Israel and Gaza. As we navigate these challenging times, the lessons from this Parasha provide insights on coping with personal and collective grief.

Parashat Chukat presents us with several poignant narratives of loss and transition. These stories, though ancient, echo the struggles we face today.

Miriam, a revered leader and prophetess, dies. The text succinctly states, “וַיָּבֹאוּ בְנֵי־יִשְׂרָאֵל כָּל־הָעֵדָה מִדְבַּר־צִן בַּחֹדֶשׁ הָרִאשׁוֹן, וַיֵּשֶׁב הָעָם בְּקָדֵשׁ; וַתָּמָת שָׁם מִרְיָם, וַתִּקָּבֵר שָׁם” (במדבר, פרק כ’, פסוק א’). “Miriam died there and was buried there” (Numbers 20:1). Her death marks a profound loss not just for her brothers, Moshe and Aharon, but for the entire Israelite community. Her presence had been a constant, a source of strength and continuity, and with her passing, the Israelites felt a deep void.

Following Miriam’s death, the Israelites face a crisis. Without Miriam, the miraculous well that provided them with water ceased to exist. Desperate and thirsty, the people turn to Moshe and Aharon, who then seek divine intervention. The Torah recounts, “וַיִּקַּח מֹשֶׁה אֶת־הַמַּטֶּה מִלִּפְנֵי יְהוָה, כַּאֲשֶׁר צִוָּהוּ. וַיַּקְהִלוּ מֹשֶׁה וְאַהֲרֹן אֶת־הַקָּהָל אֶל־פְּנֵי הַסָּלַע, וַיֹּאמֶר לָהֶם שִׁמְעוּ־נָא הַמֹּרִים; הֲמִן־הַסֶּלַע הַזֶּה נוֹצִיא לָכֶם מָיִם. וַיָּרֶם מֹשֶׁה אֶת־יָדוֹ וַיַּךְ אֶת־הַסֶּלַע בְּמַטֵּהוּ פַּעֲמָיִם, וַיֵּצְאוּ מַיִם רַבִּים; וַתֵּשְׁתְּ הָעֵדָה, וּבְעִירָם” (במדבר, פרק כ’, פסוקים ט’-י”א). “Then Moshe raised his hand and struck the rock twice with his rod. Out came copious water, and the community and their beasts drank” (Numbers 20:9-11). Moshe’ and Aharon’s actions during this crisis lead to a significant divine decree: they would not enter the Promised Land. This pivotal moment underscores the weight of leadership and the consequences of actions taken under duress.

The narrative continues with another profound loss – the death of Aharon. The Torah describes this moment with poignant detail: “וַיַּפְשֵׁט מֹשֶׁה אֶת־אַהֲרֹן אֶת־בְּגָדָיו וַיַּלְבֵּשׁ אֹתָם אֶת־אֶלְעָזָר בְּנוֹ, וַיָּמָת אַהֲרֹן שָׁם בְּרֹאשׁ הָהָר; וַיֵּרֶד מֹשֶׁה וְאֶלְעָזָר מִן־הָהָר. וַיִּרְאוּ כָּל־הָעֵדָה כִּי גָוַע אַהֲרֹן, וַיִּבְכּוּ אֶת־אַהֲרֹן שְׁלֹשִׁים יוֹם כֹּל בֵּית יִשְׂרָאֵל.” (במדבר, פרק כ’, פסוקים כ”ח-כ”ט). “Moshe removed Aharon’s garments and put them on his son Eleazar. And Aharon died there on top of the mountain. Then Moshe and Eleazar came down from the mountain, and when the whole community learned that Aharon had died, all the Israelites mourned for him thirty days” (Numbers 20:28-29). Aharon’s death signifies a major leadership transition, affecting the morale and stability of the community. The communal mourning highlighted the deep connection and collective grief felt by the people.

Fast forward to our present day, and we find ourselves navigating similar themes of loss and transition amid the ongoing conflict. The tragic events of October 7th and the subsequent violence have led to profound losses on multiple fronts. As of the latest reports^[1], 1,629 Israelis have been killed, including 682 soldiers. Each life lost is a personal tragedy and a collective wound.

The injuries sustained by many soldiers signify a permanent change in their way of life. With 4,149 soldiers physically injured in the conflict^[2], these individuals face a transition from normalcy to a new reality of adjustment and healing. The physical and emotional scars they bear remind us of the heavy toll of conflict.

The devastation caused by the attacks has also led to the loss of homes, property, and irreplaceable memories. Currently, 123,393 Israeli evacuees grapple with the reality of rebuilding their lives from the ground up^[1]. The loss of personal security, the pervasive fear, and the uncertainty that now pervade daily life have deep effects on mental health and well-being.

Additionally, the crisis of hostages taken on October 7th remains a significant concern. With 255 hostages taken, of which 135 have been released and 120 remain in captivity, the ongoing efforts to secure their release add to the collective anxiety and grief.

In both Parashat Chukat and our current situation, we see the interplay between personal and collective loss. Miriam’s death was deeply personal for Moshe and Aharon, yet it had community-wide repercussions. Similarly, the loss of a loved one today is a deeply personal experience that ripples through families and communities. Aharon’s death and the transition of leadership affected the entire community, just as the collective grief and shared experience of loss bind our communities together today as we struggle to cope with the aftermath.

Drawing from Parashat Chukat and our present-day experiences, here are some ways we can cope with loss and transition. First, acknowledging grief is crucial. Just as the Israelites mourned their leaders, it is essential for us to acknowledge and express our grief. This helps in processing the loss and beginning the journey toward healing. Community support is another key aspect. Both in ancient and modern times, coming together, sharing stories, and offering help can strengthen our resilience. Embracing change, though challenging, can lead to growth and new beginnings. And finally, focusing on hope and rebuilding is vital. Despite the losses, the Israelites continued their journey toward the Promised Land. Similarly, we must focus on hope and the future, working together to rebuild lives and communities.

Parashat Chukat and the current events in Israel, Gaza, and the entire region teach us about the profound impact of loss and the importance of transition. By acknowledging our grief, supporting one another, and embracing change, we can navigate these difficult times with resilience and hope. As we reflect on these lessons, let us commit to being there for one another, fostering unity, and working toward a future where peace and security prevail.

Feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or alone?

Visit the Israeli Ministry of Health’s website for information, support, and a list of mental health providers: Ministry of Health – Emotional and Mental Support Centers

Resources:

[1] Institute for National Security Studies (INSS)

[2] IDF Website